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Offline BlizzardTora

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Spam Jokes
« on: May 27, 2009, 04:20:47 PM »
Show me some spam jokes you found on the internet. The first topic from google has a ton.

Heres one:


Q: What do you do if a spammer throws a pin at you?
A: Run like hell - he's still got a hand-grenade between his teeth.
« Last Edit: July 10, 2009, 02:52:10 PM by BlizzardTora »


Offline v

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #1 on: May 29, 2009, 01:50:06 PM »
but i like spam :P

Offline BlizzardTora

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #2 on: May 29, 2009, 04:41:55 PM »
You should rephrase that. You like spam games. I sure you dont eat spam...

...But no doesnt mean spam games themselves. Can be about that gernade spammer you faced on halo the other day.


Offline YD

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #3 on: June 28, 2009, 12:23:17 PM »
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Norma Lee.
Norma Lee who?
Normalee I don't go around knocking on doors, but do you want to buy a set of encyclopedias?

Offline BlizzardTora

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #4 on: June 29, 2009, 12:20:36 PM »
That ones pretty good.

This ones pretty dumb.

A spammer goes to a whore house. The Madam is out of women but, since she knows the guy is a spammer she thinks she can get away with a blow up doll and he will never know the difference. Being a bit nervous because she has never tried this one before, The Madam waits outside the door. The spammer comes out in five minutes. "How was it?", says the Madam.
"I don't know," says the spammer, "I bit her on the ass and she farted and flew out the window!"


Offline YD

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #5 on: June 29, 2009, 01:32:38 PM »
A state trooper pulls over a blonde on a lonely back road and says, "Ma'am, is there a reason why you're weaving all over the road?"

The woman replied, "Oh officer, thank goodness you're here! I almost had an accident! I looked up and there was a tree right in front of me. So, I swerved to the left and there was another tree in front of me. Then, I swerved to the right and there was another tree in front of me!"

The officer reached through the side window to the rear view mirror, and explained, "Ma'am... that's your air freshener."

Offline BlizzardTora

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #6 on: July 01, 2009, 02:13:24 AM »
 ;D

nice!  8)


Offline YD

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #7 on: July 01, 2009, 11:56:47 AM »
What do you call a female sex change?

An addadictomy!

Offline bdc

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #8 on: July 02, 2009, 12:55:23 AM »

Offline YD

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #9 on: July 07, 2009, 06:47:34 PM »
The Origin of Chapstick

The old cowhand came riding into town on a hot, dry, dusty day. The local sheriff watched from his chair in front of the saloon as the Cowboy wearily dismounted and tied his horse to the rail a few feet in front of the sheriff.

"Howdy, stranger..."

"Howdy, Sheriff..."

The cowboy then moved slowly to the back of his horse, lifted its tail, and placed a big kiss were the sun don't shine. He dropped the horse's tail, stepped up on the walk, and aimed towards the swinging doors of the saloon.

"Hold on, Mister..."

"Sheriff?"

"Did I just see what I think I just saw?"

"Reckon you did, Sheriff...I got me some powerful chapped lips..."

"And that cures them?" "Nope, but it keeps me from lickin' em!

Offline BlizzardTora

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #10 on: July 08, 2009, 07:04:23 AM »
Are we doing dirty jokes now.  ;D
Try this one:

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman."

She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"

A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".


Offline YD

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #11 on: July 08, 2009, 09:46:54 AM »
 ;D
Yo mama's so hairy jokes, not directed at anyone just for reference sake, just in case you need a come back if someone teases you ;D...



Yo mama's so hairy, they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower.

Yo mama's so hairy, Bigfoot took a picture of her.

Yo mama's so hairy, her armpits look like she has Don King in a head lock.

Yo mama's so hairy, she looks like a Chia pet with a sweater on.

Yo mama's so hairy, she has afros on her nipples.

Yo mama's so hairy, you almost died of rug burn at birth.

Yo mama's so hairy, she shaves with a weedwacker.

Yo mama's so hairy, she got a trim and lost 10 pounds.

Yo mama's so hairy, when she spreads her legs ,the first thing that comes to my mind is "We're going to Bush Gardens."

Offline Fredgerd

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #12 on: July 09, 2009, 02:07:15 PM »
Whats the difference between a Scotsman and Mic Jagger??
~ Mic Jagger says "Hey  you get off of my cloud." A Scotsman says "Hey McCloud get of of my ewe"

Why do Scotsmen ware kilts??
~ Cus a sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.
For those who are curious, yes I am gone and I don't intend to be back soon. I never formally said goodbye to you all, because that always becomes a forum stink. However, to my friends here, I wish you the best. Perhaps I'll be back one day but for now this is goodbye.

-Fred

Offline BlizzardTora

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #13 on: July 10, 2009, 02:59:10 PM »
I dont know here this is always funny to watch

Sakaki from Azumanga Daioh.



Offline YD

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Re: Spam Jokes
« Reply #14 on: July 10, 2009, 08:39:28 PM »
The next set of phrases is not for the faint of heart.

Lets face it, there are a lot of "scholastically challenged" people out there. Sometimes you want to express how "Duh Ta Duh" they really are and here's how...

An intellect rivaled only by garden tools.
As smart as bait.
Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash.
Doesn't know much, but leads the league in nostril hair.
Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor.
Forgot to pay his brain bill.
His belt doesn't go through all the loops.
If he had another brain, it would be lonely.
Missing a few buttons on his remote control.
Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.
Receiver is off the hook.
Surfing in Nebraska.
An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
A few beers short of a six-pack.
A few peas short of a casserole.
The cheese slid off his cracker.
Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear.
Couldn't pour piss out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.
Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.